When it comes to my life, there is always someone texting, calling, emailing, and DMing me. I have certain boundaries set in place to protect not just my physical health, but my mental and emotional health as well.
If I don't honor these boundaries, then all it will lead to is feeling emotionally drained. And how does that help me? It doesn't! Boundaries are not just a form of self-care, they are how I take care of myself. They are essential to living a happy life where people are not burning me out and depleting me. This applies to you too!
Little by little, it seems like the world is "opening back up". Restaurants are doing in-door dining, kids are returning to school, and we seem to be getting back to a semblance of the life we had pre-covid days. As you go about trying to navigate your new normal, take into consideration the next 5 tips for setting boundaries, because, not only is spring a great time to refresh and start new, but now that we are returning to being a part of the world, let's not be the SAME as we were last year!
So much has happened in one single year! Let's not go back to the way things were- let's be BETTER! Use the spring season and the fact that we are returning to some form of normality here, as your launching pad for starting a new chapter in your life. A chapter where you prioritize self-care, you set healthy boundaries, and you finally, FINALLY take care of YOU!
My 5 Tips For Setting Healthy Boundaries
1. Start with taking a good look at your life. Right now, what is making you feel uncomfortable or stressed? What is not working? What is overwhelming you and making you want to cry? What is triggering you? You need to know what they are so you can do something about it.
2. Address it. The list you just made, now you do something about it. If you need to talk to someone, don't approach them with an attitude of confrontation. People can feel that negative vibe. Instead, treat it as an open communication where you share your needs. Addressing your needs goes beyond the physical people in your life. If you need to, unfollow anyone on social media that doesn't make you feel good, let go of friendships that are not serving you, and ask for help if you need it! The point here is that you need to take some form of action with the list that you have.
3. Now you move onto reaffirming your values. Remember what's important to you. Figure out what you need and then HONOR those needs. Honor the needs so next time, if someone wants to cross a boundary that you have, you won't let them. You teach people how to treat you. You need to start honoring and respecting your own boundaries so others follow suit.
4. Now that you know what's important to you, how will you protect your values and needs? Will you stop going to your mother-in-law's house every week? Will you delegate some of the house chores to your partner? Will you do a digital detox every weekend? Will you not answer emails and texts after a certain time? What is it that you need to have in place here, so your boundaries stay protected and respected?
5. As you go about your life interacting with others, remember to be consistent. If you're wishy-washy about your boundaries, others will be too. It's your job to be consistent and vocal about your boundaries so other people can understand, remember, and respect them.
You have people in your life, so get support from them if you need it. Get support from close family, friends, and mental health professionals if necessary. Whatever you have to do, do it! This is your life we're talking 'bout! It's okay to ask for help, it's okay to say no without giving an explanation, it's all OKAY! Don't let guilt be the driver of your life. Let self-care be the driver! It may take practice at first, but as you prioritize your needs, as you get into this habit, it will get easier and easier, and you will start to feel EMPOWERED because you're taking care of yourself! And that is just so freaking AWESOME!
Your partner in health,